A simple prayer

The other night I laid awake in bed worrying over this move to California and what all it involves. I prayed to God for all the good things in my life and the stress that I felt I was enduring. One thought that popped into my head was "God please give me the faith to do this." I stopped myself and actually sat up in bed.

Did I actually just ask God to give me Faith? What was I thinking? Faith is one of those things that I am supposed to have. I pick it up each morning as I start my day and carry it around with me to witness all the good and bad parts of myself and my day. So why was I asking for Faith?

You can imagine that I sat up for a while communing with God to get this all figured out. Because I was quite sure that God was trying to tell me something, not because I am a wonderfully gifted woman when it comes to Christianity. I struggle just like everyone else, maybe more than some and less than others.

What I came to see was that God allowed me to question my faith because I had not taken everything to him in prayer. Uh -duh! Did you see that coming? I should have. I worry to much stressing over the details and making to many lists. Now I think that lists are good, but they should not control us.

What I should have done was take the worries of our move and lay them at God's feet. Allow Him to handle the problems of a cross country move. So now that I have done what any child of God should have done, I am open for the direction that God is sending us in. Yes, that does mean that I get to make lists. Writing down the plans that are coming to me is getting our whole family excited and having doable lists helps my husband and I communicate.

How exciting that when I falter God allows mean to continue to turn to Him for help, He continues to love me, and He continues to guide me. I am so glad to have God that loves the details.

Praise be to God, who has not rejected my prayer or withheld his love from me! Psalms 66:20

Have a great week.

Amanda

We are home

We got back yesterday from our evacuation. I am glad that we left early. Base housing was put under a mandatory evacuation and the traffic would have been terrible then.
Alas, we are home and I spent the day trying to get everything back to normal.I left my pictures packed up because we are not done with hurricane season. Nothing here looks like it was disturbed. I have not driven down to the beach yet, maybe tomorrow.
Hope y'all have had a great week.
Amanda

Home

We are home from one family visit and gearing up for another. That means laundry, cleaning, shopping, and repacking. I have learned in my travels that a cooler in my friend. I go ahead to the grocery store so that I can bring snacks and drinks with us, but also milk, cereal, and sandwich makings for the next day. I can avoid having to get up and go anywhere after I get to the river. Our DVD quit and I want to cry about it. I actually think that it is the cord that plugs into it, but it will be a long trip without the DVD. Oh, back in the day when we had nothing to do but stare out the window. I don't miss that at all.

My neighbor was not home when we got back here, but her dog was in the backyard. She has small children and comes and goes at all hours so I for the first day I thought I was just missing her when she was home. Then I noticed that the same lights were always home. After 3 days, I called housing to let them know that she was not home, the dog was in the backyard and no one was seeing about it. Also told them that there was a possibility that their smaller dog was inside. I did not want to be a tattle tale, but I did not want animals to die because I did nothing. So I went and fed the dog outside for 2 days until she finally came home. Sad thing is that just because she is home doesn't mean that the dog will be treated any better. He goes without water all the time and that yard in disgusting. What would you do? I have no idea if housing got in touch with her or what she said if they did, but it astonishes me that housing did not come over here or send security over here to get a dog that was left chained up in the backyard for 5 days at least.

Right now, I am going to keep away and see what happens. Her husband is somewhere for a few weeks training. He doesn't do any better, but at least there are home to look after what is there's when he is home. I hope I am not here when he deploys for 6 months. Ugh!

Anyway, My kids are resting and so I am going to join them. Drink some tea, stay cool, and have a great day. Amanda

An end and a beginning

That dang dance recital is over. Now the summer can begin. My Memaw would wash my mouth out with soap for saying dang, or she would threaten to. A 4 hour recital is VERY LONG! Those poor kids were exhausted. They were so happy to change costumes and do their dance, but so tired when it was all done. A few tears and I saw a couple of fits from younger kids, bit all in all a smooth recital. Next year, my girl wants to fo more dances. 3 classes to be exact!

My boy was a trooper and sat with my mom until C's dances were over and then took him home. They were asleep when we got home.

We are off to spend some time with family and friends. Hope your summer is going well. Have a great week.
Amanda

My Plan

The other night I made a move. I rolled to the middle of the bed and I let myself go to that dark place where you think about the what if. What if the worst happened while my husband is deployed to a war zone? What if something happened to me? What would my kids do? I had a good cry and made a plan. It did not help me. I had a good long talk with God and fell asleep. God is good and he is watching out for me and my family, but that will not keep terrible and dramatic things from happening. My strength needs to be in Christ. How hard it is to place all the worry and stress into anybodies hands, but I am going to try harder.
Last week, I managed J's pneumonia and strep quite well. I relied on my neighbor to watch C when she got home from school. A big step because I don't rely on anybody but my husband. He could not help me, as a matter of fact he did not know anything until 3 days later. I am a strong girl and most of our emergencies happen when R is away. He almost gets in the way when I am in emergency mode. There have been others. A dog bite that required stitches, 104 temperatures, stomach viruses, falls, scrapes, and nose bleeds. Nothing to dramatic or life threatening, but enough to get your blood pumping. What made me worry was thinking of never having back up, someone else to call in, a helpmate for my kids, his kids as well. They do not want to grow up without a Dad, they want him here to kiss them good night, to snuggle on the couch with, to enforce the rules (that may be me), they want that extra person as much as I do. I had to make a plan, now I have one, I doesn't make me feel any better.